Oh, how the time does fly. And how easily I forget about this thing. Once again, I'm reminded that this should be updated at least monthly. Seriously, I was hoping for weekly, but as you can see, it didn't turn out so well.
Oh, what to say, what to say.
Really. It's been kinda depressing since the last I updated. Someone I really like had finally left and it has me feeling kinda lonely. REAL lonely. I heard that he had liked me back, but by the time I had found out, I guess it was kinda late. Heh, I kinda wanted to tell him several times on the phone, but I lost the courage to. At this point, I don't think he would think the same about me anymore even though I still think about him a lot, even when I don't want to. But we talk. And that's all I ask for.
I'm sure that he will find someone else and hopefully I will find someone as well. It was seriously a lot more fun hanging out with him than I realized. Our four-man cell is now being lazy and somewhat irritating. Seriously. I think one of them is hiding something from me and the other is getting on my nerves for different reasons. Really though, I think everyone is just splitting up and doing their own thing. So many of them are getting married or are already married, so a lot of their focus is on their families, and I guess I can't complain. But does it really hurt to just hang out for a while?
People change I guess. You grow out of things and nothing is the same anymore. And I'm still living in a fantasy world that still thinks that the old times still exist. And when I slowly begin to realize that this is all happening and it has happened, I'm filled with despair. It will not be the same. Being separated can either bring people together or tear them apart. And with the friends I have made here, it feels as if our bonds are almost torn apart. But then again, maybe I'm just trying to hard to hold on. But one thing is for certain, I feel better knowing that the bonds with my friends back home are still strong. And that's all I could ever really want.
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But on a lighter note. Or not so lighter note, I have a messed up sleep schedule. I hate that I have training, therefore, it requires me to get up early to go to it. I hate that some shifts end up being short manned and I am the one helping out causing more sleep problems. Really, I should be moved to a different position. As soon as this past team has come back, I think they want everyone to be rotated around. And if they want to do it, they should, just don't make me the one that has to be flexible. Keep me in one area and let me do that certain shift. This is why I end up being cranky Every Single Day. Seriously. I don't feel like being a B**** when I work; I really don't.
And also, my computer is retarded. It lags real bad on and media (video & audio) files and it even messes up the welcome tune. D: I very sad day indeed. But it also just lags period. I don't really know how it happened, but it did and I don't know how to fix it. I'll probably just erase everything and reinstall everything. Which will suck, but it's better than waiting for my computer to load up my settings for 20 minutes when it usually only took about 5 before. D: Why must my electronics die on me?
Yesterday was Valentines Day. I got roses from my guys friends (just the 2 I normally hang out with), candy from a friend and a card from another friend. And I helped serve (actually I more or less just sat around) the Valentines meal at our facility. But hey, I made the pretty sign and did a darn good job on my menus, if I do say so myself. :D And I got to drink a lot of good freakin' sparkling cider to boot. I need more of that stuff, seriously. I thought me and my friends were going to do something and we didn't. Boo.
Also, 14 days till I take leave.
Till next month,
Steph
And it won't let me upload my pics.... lovely....
Friday, February 15, 2008
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